As our parents get older, it's not necessarily straightforward to determine our role as adult children. Naturally, we want whatever is best for them; however, if we're not careful, we can overstep our boundaries and discover ourselves attempting to parent our parents.
This is particularly true when safety is a concern. There's a fine line between making sure senior parents is safe and promoting the independent lifestyle they require and deserve. It wasn't that long ago when our parents were meeting not only all their own needs but also ours. The change from care provider to care recipient can often be frustrating and painful for seniors.
Being mindful of this, there are specific elements of independent life that an older adult may now be missing. But, of course, if we aren't careful in exactly how we approach these losses, we may produce hurt feelings, arguments, and fractured relationships.
For example, one part of senior independence that is often jeopardized is when others step in to take over tasks that could now be a little more difficult and take a bit longer for an older adult to perform. While the intentions are undoubtedly the best, it damages a senior's self-worth and self-esteem. A far better approach is to allow additional time and only to offer assistance when truly necessary.
Yet one of the best indicators of freedom is the power to drive and go wherever and whenever we please. When driving is no longer safe for an older adult, it is essential to approach this issue with tact and empathy. Neuropsychologist Dr. Sanam Hafeez explains that adult children often lose patience with their senior parents, leading to hurtful comments that may be genuinely traumatic.
He recommends avoiding phrases such as, "You're not allowed to drive anymore!" Instead, it is much kinder and more effective to provide older adults with choices and engage them in brainstorming a viable alternative. An excellent example of this might be, "I'm sure it's getting difficult to be able to see now, which must make it very hard to operate a vehicle. So, let's speak about some options that will enable you to go wherever you want safely."
Together, you can develop an idea that's agreeable to everybody to preserve senior independence and dignity. When contemplating choices, keep in mind that Modern Health Home Care s' caregivers are available any day or night to offer safe transportation and accompaniment for seniors. Our services are available according to each senior's wishes and timeframe, involving a weekly lunch date with a friend, medical or salon appointments, attending religious services, or simply a Sunday afternoon drive to get out of the house and enjoy the scenery. We provide senior care Philadelphia families can trust. Contact us at 215.995.2012for details.
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